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Feb. 6th, 2007 @ 04:42 pm plop
Current Location: sean's basement
Current Mood: confused
hey duders! nobody reads this so i'm basically updating to myself so whateva'!! i'm actually being studious in school, which is a good thing. not failing is a pretty strange feeling. i don't know about working in a nursing home however, i reckon' i wanna work with lil babies. they make me happy. i am still working at subgay. it's still gaytastic. i am going to be an aunt soon, that's creepy. i currently drive a grandmamobile with no cd player, even though dub was rad enough to give me her old one, i still have nobody to install it so whateva'. a radio is still better than no radio. i'm starting to draw again, just a little. i want to get more tattoos, but i'm still not sure what i wanna get. Mad Caddies are coming in a few weeks and this makes my boner very pleased. I'm pretty stoked that spring is just around the corner...the very shitty, cold, snowy corner...but that's pretty coooooool. There's like a fuckin' sasquatch lurking around my house at night...it eats potatoes and recently started eating a hole in our couch. What the poop!!! Living in the country is bad fuckin' news, but i don't know...would you rather have a sasquatch lurking around your house...or like a scary, robberman?? They both fuckin' suck...i wanna live on my own little island or something, where there are no sasquatches or robbers.
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Jul. 11th, 2006 @ 06:12 am Boogers are fun.
Current Mood: sick
Current Music: No music, just boogers.
Holla'! What has it been...a bajillion years since I updated this sexy, sexy livejournal. Hmmmm...well first things first, I'm still a douchebag. It's somewhat comforting to know that not ALL things change after a bajillion years. I'm still rockin' and rollin' at Subgay. It's fucking as awesome as ever too. I do backflips as I make my way into work sometimes. I just can't help it...it's just my natural excitement shining through. I am enrolled in an LPN program at big, bad BOCES in Batavia. It starts on the 24th and I'm shitting my pants as we speak. I'm gonna need a new wardrobe by the time school rolls around because it's hard to get poo stains out. (I hate myself). I need to get all the financial aid nonsense figured out because money doesn't grow on trees yet, and I work at fucking Subgay for crying in a bucket (yeah, I did just say that). I wish money didn't have to be such a goddamn necessity. I never have enough of it! Ever! Your only options in life it seems are give into our poopy structured society and get a shitty 9-5 job so you can pay your never-ending fucking bills. OR...you can become a hippie. And not even a true-blooded hippie because that movement came and past. You become a "wanna-be" hippie. I don't know...both of those options kinda' suck balls. I'm kinda' nervous about the LPN thing. I want to eventually become an RN...because I want the money...which is pretty fuckin' sad. I don't have the "passion" that alot of people have who go into such a profession. Usually when people want to be a nurse or doctor or whatever they go into the field because they want to help people. And yeah...I DO want to help people...but I mainly want to help myself because from my own experience I have come to the conclusion that the majority of people suck. Suck big fucking ass. Which is terrible for me to say. There are alot of awesome people out there, but there's the random assholes that ruin it for me. I don't know why I let it bother me. It only takes one douchebag to ruin my day. I need to start seeing the bright side of life or something. Anyways...fuck that topic let's move on in a hurry. So I'm sick and boogery right now and I only got like an hour and a half of sleep last night. Long story short my super model career should be taking off pretty soon...I'm gonna take some snapshots and send that shit to my agent cause I'm fucking HOT today. Sean's birfday was on Sunday. We had fun. He doesn't really get all stoked for birfdays like how I do. It's a big deal. You were born and stuff...and that shit calls for a celebration. I wish I coulda' done more for him...but you know...money...it's a fucker. Warped Tour is kinda' soon...I didn't get my ticket yet. I'm mainly going for NOFX. I fuckin' love me some NOFX. I wish they would tour around these parts more often. So many good bands are on this tour...but I know that it's gonna be butt-packing with butt-darts. Serial butt-darts...lots of 'em. Everywhere. They should just rename the tour Butt Tour. That name does kind of make sense, it's a butt-dart convention, you feel and smell like butt by the end of the day. But it's still fun-times and I like the music so whatever. Alrighty, I'm gonna blow. Have an enjoyable day!
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Mar. 31st, 2006 @ 01:07 am poop
Current Mood: thankful
Current Music: Extreme
Motion City rocked my boner last night.
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Feb. 14th, 2006 @ 12:48 am I just pooped and I don't have enough money to buy a new pair of depends. It's uncomfortable.
Current Mood: poop pants
Current Music: me pooping my pants
Hey Hey Hey niggaz! What the fuck up?!?! Oh you betta' believe I be updating my LJ yo'.
Soooooo....here's the latest and greatest:
~As you can tell by my first few sentences...I have magically transformed races. I'm singing it loud...I'm now black...and do I dear say proud. (and yes, I'm still totally grooooooosssssss).
~I have broken up with G-Dub, we are no longer seeing each other. That motherfucker just wasn't doing it for me (aka I'm a retard. Special Olympics here I come). So alas...no more radio show it seems. (It's been like months since there has been a show...but I'm lazy and a boner..and I don't update...eva'...til now!!!!
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Hey Hey Hey niggaz! What the fuck up?!?! Oh you betta' believe I be updating my LJ yo'.
Soooooo....here's the latest and greatest:
~As you can tell by my first few sentences...I have magically transformed races. I'm singing it loud...I'm now black...and do I dear say proud. (and yes, I'm still totally grooooooosssssss).
~I have broken up with G-Dub, we are no longer seeing each other. That motherfucker just wasn't doing it for me (aka I'm a retard. Special Olympics here I come). So alas...no more radio show it seems. (It's been like months since there has been a show...but I'm lazy and a boner..and I don't update...eva'...til now!!!! <like ohmygod! no way!!!!)I'm cool too...right guys???? (Dub...can I get a witness?).
~I am still a disgruntled sandwich artist. Life seems unbearable at times, for I am constantly striving for perfection when it comes to my artform. Just call me fuckin' Picasso.
~I have met the bearded man of my dreams. And yes...you guessed it...he does have a beard! Sean for life!!
~Smellyville is still smelly.
So there you go...I got nothing further at this moment to report on. I usually write novels when I update (you know, the whole what...three entries I've done!) but this is no more. I am a minimalist now. No more novels for this Corky.
<img src="http://www.nndb.com/people/380/000086122/burke.jpg"></img> (the goddman image won't come up! I suck!!!!!!!)

Later baters!
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Jul. 31st, 2005 @ 09:15 pm Anarchy means that I litter
Current Mood: happy
Current Music: Atom and his Package- "Snowshoe BBQ"
Wow...what the hell is going on lately?!?!?! Are the powers that be playing a prank on me?!?(woah...I just inadvertently rhymed right there. I am fuckin' awesome! That was pretty much the coolest wordplay I've ever experienced! Laaaaaaaame!)Soooooo...I don't know what is happening right now...but shit seems to actually be falling into place for me (which is rare). I mean, I don't want to sound like a douchey complainer or anything...but seriously life seems to hate me at times. I guess it hates everybody at some point...but that motherfucker has seriously had a kung-fu deathgrip on my ass for quite sometime now. Which I guess explains my hesitation about everything. It's a good/weird feeling. ANYWAYS...enough about me...I mean, what is this...some sorta' fuckin' journal about me or some shit! C'mon!

So, I haven't been to a show...in like a month or something. What the shit is that all about?!?!?! Dub brought up a good point last Thursday at the show, when I bust outta' here who the hell am I/she gonna go to shows with?!?! Fuck!!! It won't be the same. SHIT!!!!(I am seriously a truckdriver). I also tried to find places around where I'm going, where they have shows and shit...I got fuckin' nothing!!!! I think I'm just retarded though...there has to be SOME place out there...yet, there is only one Dub. Everybody had best start going to more shows (Joe and Garber!!) and watch after the 'ol Dubster. I remember when everybody went to shows...then it was just Dub and I, which was good times! Shows are fun, I wanna go to one right now...however...I "reckon'" there isn't much of a happenin' scene down here in Smellyville. Hahahaha...I mean don't get me wrong here, gaycore Bliss is a pretty snazzy (hahaha..snazzy? Where did that come from!! I am gonna use that word more often) place...and by "snazzy" I mean totally redunkulous! (Redunkulous...now that's a word I haven't busted out in quite sometime!!)
So...wow! Is it just me, or does this update totally blow big-time?!??! Yeah, it really does. I find that I write better when I'm distressed or distraught about something...which I usually am! Since everything is kinda' good right now...I'm content and it's totally fucking me up. It's weird. I'm weird. This update is weird....and short(for me). Fuck it!!!! I'm gonna go...and oh...I dunno...be...happy? Whaaaaaaaaaaaat!!!!
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Jun. 28th, 2005 @ 09:25 pm (no subject)
Current Mood: dirty
Holy Shit dude! Do I smell LJ entry #3?????? Oh yeah...you had betta' believe it! Wow...so I am sitting here feeling kinda' (actually...extremely...yeah...I feel EXTREMELY) disgusting. Not really a BAD disgusting (yeah, I didn't know there was such a thing as GOOD disgusting either) but alas...it isn't that bad. Basically, it's just your average, run-of-the-mill disgusting which is associated with the summertime. Yeah...the sweaty, crabby, smelly awesomeness associated with the boner sweltering days of summer. This kickin' 95 bajillion degrees we have been experiencing...totally sexy. I mean, I am ALL about the summertime (fuck winter! BLAH! fuck winter for life) but the sweaty, poopiness kinda' gets to me too. I long for a happy medium. Not toooooo ball-sweaty hot (I mean...I dont' even have balls...and somehow I have managed to be "sweatin' my balls off!"
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Holy Shit dude! Do I smell LJ entry #3?????? Oh yeah...you had betta' believe it! Wow...so I am sitting here feeling kinda' (actually...extremely...yeah...I feel EXTREMELY) disgusting. Not really a BAD disgusting (yeah, I didn't know there was such a thing as GOOD disgusting either) but alas...it isn't that bad. Basically, it's just your average, run-of-the-mill disgusting which is associated with the summertime. Yeah...the sweaty, crabby, smelly awesomeness associated with the boner sweltering days of summer. This kickin' 95 bajillion degrees we have been experiencing...totally sexy. I mean, I am ALL about the summertime (fuck winter! BLAH! fuck winter for life) but the sweaty, poopiness kinda' gets to me too. I long for a happy medium. Not toooooo ball-sweaty hot (I mean...I dont' even have balls...and somehow I have managed to be "sweatin' my balls off!"<Grossest saying EVER!) Actually...that saying is tied with "My old lady" or "My old man"< GROOOOOOSS! Don't even get me started with that shit...I fuckin' LOATHE people who say that shit. "OH...gotta' get home, and see my old (or 'ol..depends on how disgusting the person is)lady/man. Fuckin' disgusting. If my husband ever referred to me as his "Old/'Ol lady"...I'd fucking puke all over him...then divorce him on the spot. Awesome. Wow...anyways...moving on, I am really getting sick and tired with this bullshit (yeah...I don't know WHY I keep using the term "bullshit" every other sentence. I don't even use that word much. Hmmm...I guess it's just the fuckin' word of the day...gee...now that I think about it...I have been dropping the "f"bomb(fuckin' gay-ass term..."Ooohhhh...somebody just DROPPED THE "F" BOMB!" GAY!!!! GAY!!!!!)alot as well. Yeah...so "bullshit" and "fuckin'"...words of the day. Alright...now that we have that squared away...let's get back on track now shall we? Hmm...what the fuck was I talkin' about...uhhh...oh yeah...I am SO over this fuckin' bullshit healthy eating crap. Fuck it. Fuck it alot. Man...I mean, moderation is the key...however, I am such a douchebag (hahaha...ok...so this is TOTALLY off topic right now...but speaking of DOUCHEBAG...so...I was driving to work today and I have random moments of road rage. Soooo, this turdburglar in an SUV is in front of me in town (yeah...this is the sexy town of Warsaw...actually, it's more of a metropolis. A marvelous, majestic metroplolis) and I am soooo close to work...yet soooo far away, because this douchebag was going like 15mph..and the fucker kept slamming on his brakes. So, I was getting all pissy (not only because I was running a little late, but the weather kinda' amplifies my bitchiness at times. Yeah...I can be a douchebag too. WOW...big surprise there). So...the dude slams on his brakes for like the millionth time in like fuckin' two minutes...and I'm like "Jesus Christ!(Kim Gwynne!> in my mind) What the fuck is this DOUCHEBAGGLER doing!" Yeah...DOUCHEBAGGLER! After I said it...I fuckin' busted out my annoying laugh/squawk...I'm like "Douchebaggler? What the fuck is that?!?!? Hahahahaha! It sounds like some sorta' evil/asshole villian from like a comic book or some shit!" (yeah...I actually said all of this to myself too! I'm weird.)Hahahaha! Fuckin' douchebaggler! It's like Hamburglar...yet it's Douchebaggler. Awesome. WOW! OK...I need to end this shit...right now! I am going to Florida the day after tomorrow...and guess who hasn't packed fuckin' shit! I haven't packed FUCKIN' BULLSHIT to be exact! (Score for me...both words of the day...in one sentence. Amazing!)
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May. 11th, 2005 @ 01:48 pm "...and here we have some boondoggle keychains...a must have for this seasons fashion."
Current Mood: drained
Wow, it is pretty much a miracle right now that I am even updating this poopy livejournal! You know...I am just SOOOOOOO busy lately, you know...sitting around touching myself and all. That shit takes alot outta' you! No, but serially...(yeah, I had to bust out the serially right there, it was necessary), my grandmaishness has been getting the best of me...in a BIG way. I'm not talkin' like a 'lil nappy nap here...and a 'lil knitting and BINGO rockin' it there. Oh no...my friends...we're talkin' ridiculously outta' control "grandmaishness." Actually, I think it has boomed past the grandma phase...I think I am just turning into a straight-up narcolept. No...serially! (yeah...that is serially #2). Fuckin' (yeah, i'm a dirty truckdriver now!) after I got outta' work on Sunday (I spanked it 7-4pm...awesome) so....I get home...after awhile my familia and I sat down for "din-din" (hahaha...din-din...why?!) so...we ate...nothing exciting...yadda, yadda, yadda...blah..blah...blah...then after everything was said and done...dude...it happened! OK...so, I'm up...totally alert (you know...as alert as I can be...I have a tendency to have my head up my ass from time to time, but whateva'!) I think I was talkin' to one of the Smellies...I am in my living room now...I plop onto our couch [serially...(yeah...serially #3 right there)...I fuckin' just sprawl out on our couch, like it was nobody's business...ok...but I am still "conscious" and shit...the TV was on...I don't recall the program that was on...like it even fuckin' matters because...dude, I was out like a fuckin' light...within a mere minute. Serially! (#4! Gross!) It was the craziest fuckin' thing too...I am talkin' like...I just fuckin' closed my eyes (and I realize that everybody has an occurrence when they are just sooooo tired, that they pass out the minute their head hits their pillow...this is not a big deal) however, this occasion was different. It was totally fucked up, because I was "asleep"...but I was also kinda' "with it" at the same time. And what was even more awesome, was that while I was being a big narcoleptic freak...the Smellies kept talkin' to me...like coming up to me and conversing with me...like I even knew what they were fuckin' saying!!! I also heard my mom talking about me...but I guess after awhile the Smellies must have gotten' the hint that I was essentially out fuckin' cold (sorta' since I was kinda' "aware" of what was going on around me...ahhh...actually...scratch that...by now...I really was fuckin' out cold. It was disgusting...it was ridiculous...it was grandmatastic!) The thing that really gets me here...is that there is NO, absolutely NO NO NO NO...uhhh....NO!!!! reason for me to be so goddamn tired!! I am twenty-yrs.-old for crying out loud (hahaha...who fuckin'says that?! "Crying out loud!!" Wow...I really am a friggin' grandma! "Oh...for crying out loud sonny boy!! I reckon' back when I was your age, I had to walk twenty miles to school...in bare feet...and we had to watch out fer' all those crazy dinosaurs and such..." Disgusting!!!!) So the moral of the story...I am gross! It was just really weird how the entire scenario went down (my narcolepticness on Sunday). Then...after I finally "came to"...I looked around...completely retarded...all yawning and shit...I spot a Smelly, and I ask "Dude...did I just like...pass out? What time is it?" Smellies response, "Uhhh..yeah...you definitely did pass out! Freak! It's like 7:30..." So that was my cooly birdness for Sunday. So...then...I went to sleep that night...at a relatively reasonable hour...the next morning I get a knock at my door from my mom "Hey, Savannah...you gonna' get up today...or what!" Ok...so it was ONLY like...tenish...(yeah...we're early risers out here in the boonies. Anything past...like...9 o'clock is CRAZY!!!! ohhhh...ten o'clock...fuckin' rebel!!!!) Anyways...so, I get up...and I was just fuckin' drained! I am talkin' like disgustingly....just...drained. Like I hadn't slept in fuckin' months! Disgusting....serially!!!(I reckon' that's #5...enjoy) So...here I sit...it's Wednesday...still disgusting! Still drained! Still...slfjlsjflsgj43pqoi5upogijlfkgj....oh! Woah!Woah...woah...woah!!!! What just happened?!?! Wow...sorry 'bout that guys...I reckon' I just passed out on the keyboard! Narcolepsy for life!!! Fucking redunkulous!!! (yeah...that's redunkulous #1 for this entry...and that's the only one you're gonna get...cuz this motherfuckin' grandma has to go make some sammiches for rednecks. Serially!!!!!!! (oh yeah...you betta' believe that was #6...ish!!!!!)
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Apr. 28th, 2005 @ 04:02 pm Oh, G-Dub...why do you tempt thee?
Current Mood: indescribable
Current Music: Nope..no music...just sexiness!!!
Sooooooo.....who creates a livejournal...and doesn't post ANYTHING in it??? Well...do ya' know...well...do ya'...do ya'??? Well....as of just one minute ago (give or take...screw telling time! Tellin' time is fo' pussies!! GROOOOOOSSSSS!!!)I was perhaps the only lame-ass on God's green earth who had a livejournal...with NO entries. Well...after much debating with myself (debating what exactly? hahaha...who knows?!!) and much hardcoreness from my amigos...I decided to "cave in" and today...oh yes...TODAY....this very, awesomely, splendiferric day...I am posting my very FIRST livejournal entry!!! Three cheers for Smelly!!! But, take it easy my friends...I am new at this...it is my very "first" time...so I am kinda' nervous! I am a livejournal virgin...so to speak. They always say the first time is the most nerve-racking...ok...I think I'll be m'kay though...alrighty! Let's just take this sloooooooow!!! (Does anybody else have a boner right now besides me?!?!) Soooooo....I am definitely sitting here...at the coolest, hippest joint in town...oh, yeah...you betta' believe I am kickin' it G-Dub style!! And can I just say...it is very tough trying to focus when I am surrounded by perhaps...the sexiest motherfuckers alive!!! WOW! I mean...is it hot in here?...or is it just all the flamin' a-holes I am surrounded by?!?! Hahaha.....Gross! Soooo...I am still trying to simmer myself down from the LTJ show the other night!! It was flipping (yeah...I'm Napoleon Dynamite) amazing!!! I am still a big fan of going to shows, despite my grandmaishness that seems to be steadily increasing with every passing moment it seems! It's cool though...being a twenty-year-old grandma...at least I have the Dubster to be a grandma with! It isn't as much fun trying to race your "Rascal" (my motorized cart...for all those wieners who are not down with the crustiness) by yourself! I know this from experience. Moving on...so...I just (well actually...like 3hrs. ago) went to the "big, bad" station meeting. And can I just tell you... there was like nobody there! Well...except for perhaps the sexiest beast alive. Yes...Smitty was there...and thus, "The Crotch" had another one of her elusive boners. (ewww...I just referred to myself as "The Crotch"...who am I?) I "reckon'" I am gonna' have two shows this summer. I guess if I'm gonna bust outta' G-Dub...I might as well make my last memories of this poophole worthwhile! And..since doing the radio show is the ONLY thing I enjoy doing in college...I think this prospect of having "two shows" will be rather enjoyable. The drive will be disgusting (on account that I am still kickin' it in Smellyville...oh, yeah..."The Boonies"...where the sasquatches roam plentifully, and the concept of proper dental care is nonexistent...ahhhh...yes...Bliss. Bliss, New York...aka..."Heaven on Earth!" I believe when God was creating this vast, wondrous universe...when he was creating the majestic planet that we inhabit...he paused...reflected, for merely a moment...then decided, "Ya' know (God doesn't have to speak grammatically proper. He is God for Christ's sake! Hahaha...pun intended!!) I think there should be one place...if only but a small town perhaps...a place where people can go to experience the pleasures in life. A place where my children can be free...free to be themselves...to love and take in the wonders of this grand Earth I have just created. A place of solitude...of understanding...of Bliss." HA!!! That was disgusting! Moral of that story...the drive to the shows will be kinda' stinky...but it'll be worth it!! Alrighty duders...I think that this novel is getting kinda' lengthy...and my boner is getting kinda' noticeable...I don't really want to get kicked outta' the library right now. Especially a G-Dub library! Gosh! (Napoleon Dynamite...AGAIN!!You know..you would think that this "Napoleon Dynamite" thing would be getting kinda' old by now...however...to me..it has only just begun! It is still funny to me...and that may make me easily amused, and lame...however...you see, I am easily amused... and I am DEFINITELY lame...so there you have it. I hope all of you (and by "all" I mean Kristen...hahaha...prolly the only one that would ever read this shit!) have enjoyed my first awesome livejournal...thingy!! Hahaha..I just said thingy. Yeah...
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